Random Discipline Thoughts

My office receives many emails & phone calls about discipline - it's a hot, continuous issue with parents! Over the years I've answered so many questions that I've a 1-hr CD called "Creative Discipline" available.

Here, I want to share random thoughts on discipline. So whether you're reading this as a grandparent, a childcare provider, social worker, or a parent, let one of these thoughts inspire you this week:

Kids gone wild? How do you teach a child to be self-controlled? My answer, be in charge of yourself and model how to behave. When kids see you control your emotions during frustrating times, they learn that skill too.

Want to raise responsible kids? Model personal responsibility. Let your children hear you say, "That's my job," or "That's what I must do." Without responsibility, kids gradually lose self-respect. When my daughters were young, the older one used to tattle, "Mom, Laura is _________ (fill in the blank)." I'd gently remind her, "It's my job to parent Laura, I'll take care of it my way." Kids need a parent who is their ally. Even when they are acting the most unlovable, try to understand them and show you love them in spite of their difficult behavior.

How do you be a hero to kids? Model integrity. Also read lots of good ole fashioned fairy tales. Why? Fairy tales provided examples of heroes and values.

Give forethought to how you'll handle a discipline situation. Too many parents are unprepared and end up reacting. Rather, mentally rehearse so you can be proactive in your teaching.

Many parents (and grandparents) tell me about a strong-willed child. Here's something you may know but, it'll serve as a reminder: despite their will power, they don't want to be in charge. It frightens children when they feel the adult isn't in charge. And just because they have a strong will doesn't mean you have to cave in.

If you want to order a Creative Discipline CD, send $10 (U.S. orders only) to me: P.O. Box 1302 | Mount Vernon, OH 43050. Hurry, only a few remain.