Permanent Impressions Begin Today

Preschoolers remind me of wet cement. Their receptive minds are imprinted with the interests and values of their parents. As the parent of a 3 or 4 year old, you have a hand in impressing your child with a lifelong affection for books. Here are two daily strategies:

Read Everything Aloud.  Your mail, magazine articles, recipes, the bills, street signs, and greeting cards make for teaching moments.  As your child hears you read he becomes aware that print has a purpose.  Since he wants to imitate you, his favorite person, he wants to be able to read.  By your example, at 4 he will “have begun to understand that printed words have meaning. By age 5, most will begin to know that not just the story, but also the printed words themselves go from left to right.  Many will even be identifying some capital and small letters and simple words.”

Happy New Year

It's almost here! Thanks for reading my blog. You’re welcome to share it via Twitter, Facebook, or forward to someone who may benefit from it too. This year, I hope you'll encourage soon-to-be or new parents with a gift copy of The Birth to Five Book, available online at http://bit.ly/6KMItC or get signed copies from me. To receive a signed copy mail $12 (incl S&H) to me at: P.O. Box 1302 | Mount Vernon, OH 43050. Hurry, this offer ends at the end of January.

Now, what's your New Year discipline resolution?

Not screaming.

More patience.

Set boundaries . . . and keep 'em!

Teach self-controlled behaviors.

Get my kid toilet trained.

Make 'em listen to me.

Show that I love them even if they think I'm mean.

Move my teen out of the house.

Does one of the above fit your discipline goal for the new year or do you have your own?

When I was a new mom, one of my parenting goals was to practice discipline with an instructive attitude. I didn't adopt the attitude that my kids were in a me-against-you war. Rather I tried to maintain the attitude that they needed my help to know right from wrong, how to gain satisfaction in appropriate ways, and how to succeed in life through appropriate talk and behavior.

Have you thought about your goal in discipline? I'd love to hear it. Leave your comment below and tell me what you'll strive for in the coming year.

©Copyright, 2011, Brenda Nixon. The Birth to Five Book available Amazon.com. Follow my work and life in 140 characters on Twitter.

Look at Me

One of my pet peeves is talking to a person who looks over my head (that's easy, I'm short) or at his watch and acts as if something - or someone else - is more important. I feel devalued, useless, invisible.

It's painful when people we love don't listen to us. But, do we do that to children? Do we make them feel as if our agenda is more important than what they have to share?

In your daily discipline, remember to look at your child - not over his head. Eye contact sends a powerful message that he is worthwhile and worthy of your time. Remember the old adage, "The eye is the pathway to the heart."

So what's one of your pet peeves. Feel free to comment below.

Notice the Negative but avoid Negative Thinking

"He stomps on the floor."
"She resists doing one simple chore!"
"He cries when he can’t have a toy."
"She's moody."

You’re not responsible for every random thought that pops in your head, only ones you entertain. To think, “That child is rude” may enter your mind and probably do little harm. Maybe she is being rude or selfish. You might have made an accurate observation of childhood behavior. But adding more to your observation, “And she’s such a BRAT,” or “I CAN'T that kid!” starts a cycle of negative thinking that impairs your skillful response.

To notice the floor is filthy may be a factual observation. To add, “Why is everyone here so lazy?” begins a negative thinking cycle interfering with your relationships and performance. Sweeping the floor clean is to take corrective action.

Likewise, noticing a child’s behavior is a certain way, is not negative thinking. But do you stew on that assessment? Do you label the child based on behavior? Do you harbor an attitude against her? Or do you stop your thought there and positively confront and correct the inappropriate behavior?

As a childcare professional or parent, it’s critical to know the distinction between a negative thought and negative thinking. You control your thinking. Don't let it control you and how you discipline.

The Birth to Five Book: Confident Childrearing Right from the Start is available online http://is.gd/jaTZ or get signed copies by mailing me $12 per book (U.S. orders only) at: P.O. Box 1302 | Mount Vernon, OH 43050.
Finally, for fun facts follow me on twitter .

©Copyright 2011, Brenda Nixon.

Change Your Environment

Changing or modifying a child's play or living environment can be a useful tool in helping them develop self-control. It's especially effective on younger children.

What happens when you change a child's environment? It can prevent difficulties from arising as well as done in response to a problematic behavior.

Below is a list for building success into a child's environment. Think of some concrete examples or ideas for every category that you may use. Be creative in how you wish to modify the environment to help promote the child's self-control.

• ORGANIZING helps children learn how to sort, pick up, and find their own things. Organizing increases the child's ability to accomplish self-care tasks. When my daughters were young, I put their books on a lower shelf so they were all together, easy to find, and easy (hopefully for them) to pick up and reshelf.
• ENHANCING the environment involves those activities that make your child's world full of age-appropriate and interesting items. Think of most daycares or preschools where age-appropriate chairs, sand tables, posters, books, wall hangings, and toys are available to children and enrich their curiosity and learning. Is there a way you can rearrange your child's bedroom to help him learn how to spend time alone, occupy himself, develop hobbies, focus, and concentrate?
• SOOTHING is a technique used most often with babies. Simply remove sources of stimulation like the TV or bright lights or bright colors from the environment. When I taught preschool and the children would become over-active, loud, or aggitated, I'd simply lower the lights. By doing so, they'd quiet. Then I could give my instructions in a quieter voice (never add to the volume by screaming over their voices!). What stimulation can you remove today?

-- this is good discipline.

Remember children's "bad" behavior can be avoided or eased through modifying your (their) environment.

Looking for an insightful, practical, and easy read on parenting issues? Try The Birth to Five Book, available on Amazon or buy an autographed copy from me! If you mail $12 (U.S. orders only) to me: P.O. Box 1302 | Mount Vernon, OH 43050, I'll sign & send a book to you.

Give Your Child True Security

Want to meet your child's emotional need for security? Then give him rules and limits.

Kids need to feel adults are in control of situations. I like the way Wesley H. Fleming states it in his book, Raising Children on Purpose , "In the absence of rules and limits, a child feels insecure. Do you remember how you felt in grade school when there was no adult supervision on the playground? Remember the bullies? Remember your frustration as the rules of the kickball game were ignored or kept changing? Children need rules and limits to feel protected."

In your daily discipline, give your child security and safety through consistent, reasonable rules and limits.

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Join me every Tuesday morning for an hour of empowerment on The Parent's Plate show www.toginet.com/shows/theparentsplate.

Excitement is rampant here in my office. We just learned today that The Birth to Five Book will be awarded the Good Parenting Seal from Parental Wisdom. Soon they will post it on their website plus send Press Releases to the media. But we couldn't wait to announce it here now.

So what do you think? Have you read the book yet? If so, please share your review on amazon, bn.com and any other websites. . . or leave a comment here. Thanks.